June 5, 2014

Fine - A Four Letter Word

Fine. It's a four letter word I never use... until the other day. I was talking to my best friend on the phone when he asked how I felt and I slowly answered fine. I thought for once I'd edit my response, not complain and try to be PC. Who the hell was I kidding? This is my best friend for many years and he wasn't buying it...

Friend:  Are you kidding me? Fine. Really?

Me:  Yeah, I'm trying to be positive. I'm fine.

Friend: You're full of it, that's not you. You always say how you feel! (Pause) What's wrong?

Me: Okay, you're right.

Friend: Fine is NOT acceptable.

Me:  I know, I know. I hate that word. I think it's the first time I ever used the word fine to describe anything. What was I thinking? It's a horrible word.

Friend: I know, right?

Me: Absolutely! I am not fine. I feel terrible. I'm upset. I'm pissed off the play didn't make the final cut and I haven't slept much the last few nights. I've been a raving bitch and that's not even the half of it! Fine? F*ck FINE. It's a four letter word and I will never use it again to describe my feelings or answer a question.

Friend: Thank you, my sentiments exactly.

Me: Thanks for listening, you know me too well. Enough about me, how are you doing?

Friend: Oh thanks for asking. I'm really fine.

Me: No you're really a bitch.

Friend: Yeah, a fine bitch! Gotcha.

Me: So, talk to you tomorrow and I promise no more four letter words.

Friend: Really? Since when? I wouldn't know you any other way.

Me: Fine.

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