Groomzillas vs. The Wedding Monster

I was planning on giving the full wedding report in this blog entry, but I've put too much pressure on myself & realized I have turned into a Gay Groomzilla & still have not returned to my normal self yet! So I will give a detailed report on my next entry, I promise... if only to share the experiences of what we went through getting ready for our marriage. The drama, the laughs, the detours, the fun, the sweat, the surprises, the horors, the crunch - all of it!

Don't give up on me, it was a lot to digest getting married after being together for 17 years & trying to plan it from across the country made it even more challenging! That plus being back home (in NYC) is always an emotional experience for me. In NYC, I am constantly being surrounded by life, energy & friends (all of which I adore), but this time I was super sensitive because of our pending wedding. Enter the Gay Groomzillas, still not sure who was worse (or better, depending on your point of view)!!!

Now some of you have asked when is the California party gonna take place, because originally our plan was to have another celebration out here also. In a "nutshell" it ain't gonna happen, but that's a whole 'nother story that we won't get into now. Our party was in NYC & it rocked, anything else would be a bad imitation & just pale in comparison. We're not the kind of people to sit around a table with place cards & not mingle or dance.  

Returning to Suburbia emotionally drains me, it takes me awhile to "re-adjust". I just get real down & move at a slower pace & continue to compare both places feeling caught in the middle. Once I'm back in Suburbia, I start planning my next return visit to NYC... & this is before we unpack & do laundry! This is my story, so I just want ya to know that I'm still trying to survive Suburbia with my Sanity, $ense & Style. Some days it just takes longer coz I may be a lot less sane & a lot more sensitive, but hopefully always keeping my style - after all, I am a married man now!  

"Our Wedding" Teaser Video

http://youtu.be/TQCMDfu0JoQ

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"What Matters Most"... You Decide

Who wouldda thought that getting married could make the front page cover story of the newspaper? Well, maybe if they were a celebrity couple, royalty or "reality" stars... but we're not!!! We are just two simple guys with a dream! Did I just say that? Okay, maybe we are not that simple... in fact, there's nothing simple about us. We were lucky enough to have won a contest to meet Barbra Streisand last month & that came at a time in our lives when we really needed a jolt of excitement, so thank you Barbra. 


Trying to adjust to life in Suburbia maybe could have some excitement after all. A full page article "all about us"? How great is that!!! You just gotta try a lot harder out in Suburbia. Excitement comes too easy living in NYC - like that's a problem? No complaints from me on that one as you may know from my previous posts. Here's the link to the story:  http://www.marinij.com/lifestyles/ci_18736256


So the big news is we are returning back "home" to NYC to get married!!! WTF? After 17 years together, we are finally "allowed" to get married! How ironic is that? Anyway, we wouldn't have wanted it any other way... well, actually why is it that we still can't get married here? But, that's another story. More about our NYC Wedding in my next post when I will actually be married! Wow, that's the first time I wrote that!!!


Maybe it was when Barbra wished us luck on our marriage that the good kharma started. Anyway, August 23, 2011 the day our cover story hit the news stands & her new CD was released... Coincidence? You decide, it's all "what matters most".


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"The Main Event" - Meeting Barbra STREISAND !!!

So what do you do when you finally get a chance to meet a celebrity you've admired your entire life? I am not a fanatic, but Barbra's career has been important & meaningful to me ever since I can recall! Lines from her movies & songs are a part of my daily vocabulary. "Don't tell me not to live just sit & putter..."

I have a connection to her through her work, since that has been the extent of it. I was never fortunate enough to see (or been able to afford) one of her rare live concerts. We both are from New York & have a similar rhythm that comes from being native New Yorkers. I learned to question things & see things differently because she made me aware of these options at a very young age, so I am forever grateful to her for that. "Papa, can you hear me? Try to understand me..."

Long story short, as you may have read in my previous post, I won a contest through Sony Records to coincide with the release of her latest recording "What Matters Most". It was called The Barbra Streisand Flyaway Sweepstakes & I was chosen to meet Barbra Streisand in Vegas on the set of her latest movie - "My Mother's Curse". There was ONE winner & it was ME!!! OMG! "It's gonna be a great day..."

Sooooooooo, what the hell do you say to an icon when you finally get to meet them? I had a list of things I would say, but I was just overwhelmed with emotion & was not able to do my "checklist". The first glimpse I caught of her is when she appeared on the set. I was about 20 feet away from her & I could not believe I was actually watching Barbra shooting a scene & I was gonna meet her in a few minutes. My armpits were wet, my mouth was dry, my lips were tense & I was doing my deep breathing to help calm me down for what seemed like an eternity. "There are moments you remember all your life. There are moments you wait for and dream of all your life. This is one of those moments..."

During a break in the filming, she looked my way & headed towards me, almost tripping over the velvet rope pointing & saying - "Ohhhhh, you must be the winner!" and she extended her hand towards me. Holy shit!!! She came towards ME & spoke to ME. (And yes her hands were incredibly soft "like butter"). I was almost at a loss for words, which is a first for those of you that know me. I introduced myself & she was "sweet as pie" to me. We talked about her upcoming album, I told her I enjoyed one of the cuts, she asked which one & I hummed a few lines. (I hummed to Barbra)! OMG!!! I wished her Mazel Tov on the success of her yet to be released CD. When I told her that she was my first wedding gift, she looked at me like - whaddya tawkin' 'bout, kid? I explained my partner of many years & I will finally be "allowed" to get married & we were returning to NYC to do it! She in turn wished me lots of luck & said that it was about time & how happy she was for us. She immediately asked her photographer to take our pictures (she was truly excited for us), but he suggested to shoot on the set, since the lighting was better. We walked over to the set together, which was in Caesar's Palace lobby in Las Vegas. I said "Wait a minute, I wanna get my good side". She looked at me & said "Which is your good side"? I said "you tell me, you're the director". She laughed. OMG! I made Barbra Streisand laugh AND congratulate me all within a few minutes. She was so warm, engaging & real. After the photo shoot, she told me to ..."stick around for as long as I want to...". Wow!!! She liked me, she really liked me! But I was thinking -  "Nicky Arnstein, Nicky Arnstein... I'll never see her again." NOT true, I was on & off the set for the rest of the night & was even asked if I wanted to be in a scene taking place at the slot machines (OMG, yesss)! Somewhere in between all that, I had gathered up the courage to ask if I could get some vintage magazines autographed & she not only personally signed them, she signed them in the specific color markers I requested!!! WTF? "Extra, extra I'm in love. I'm gonna thank my lucky stars above..."


At the end of the night, which slowly turned into early morning, I was exhausted. I was leaving the set when Barbra's publicist asked "are you leaving already"? I said it's really late & it was a full day for me, BUT if Barbra wants to have a glass of champagne when she wraps filming, I'll head back downstairs immediately!!! The anticipation, the preparation, the planning, the traveling, the uncertaintly, the meeting, the conversation, the photos, the laughter, all "the memories" made it truly a once in a lifetime experience & I knew that I was extremely lucky. I mean "How lucky can you get?" And as Barbra said in "Yentl"... "Nothing is impossible". She was right... once again!

Thanks for visiting my blog and please leave any comments, suggestions or thoughts about what you've read. If there is anything you'd like to add related to NYC vs Suburbia, please feel free to do so. I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon. Please spread the word. Until our next time...

"Hello Gorgeous" - Nose 2 Nose with Barbra Streisand?

I must have a pretty loud voice because the universe heard me! 

In my previous  blog entry I was complaining (like a good New Yorker does) about the lack of celebrities in Suburbia. Well, a few days ago I received confirmation of a contest I entered. I WON the opportunity to meet one of the greatest stars living today!!! OMG, I am hyperventilating just thinking about it... Barbra Streisand!!! WTF??? This has got to be some sort of kharma! Two New York kids meeting nose to nose in Vegas. (If I had a choice it would've been Brooklyn, but this makes it even more surreal).

Okay, okay. Breathe. What do you wear... what do you say when meeting Barbra? It's not that I never met or had celebrity run ins, but THIS is an actual meeting... she's expecting ME on the set! It's all a bit much to digest, but the reality of it all is starting to settle in. Now I really do feel like a "Suburbanite", a "New Yorker" wouldn't be nervous at all. It's something that happens a lot to New Yorkers... okay maybe not being invited to the set to chat, but walking by a set as they are filming. I guess I still have the New Yorker in me, because I did switch flights & seat assignments already. And of course I'll request photo approval, but other than that... OMG!!!

I feel better being able to share my experience as it's happening, so I can remember the emotions that have been snowballing. Starting with disbelief, increasing anxiety & escalating to being totally psyched!

BTW, Have I complained about never winning the lottery out here in Suburbia??? I said, have I complained about  NEVER winning the lottery out here in Suburbia? Helllooo, are you listening?

Thanks for visiting my blog and please leave any comments, suggestions or thoughts about NYC vs Suburbia. I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Suburban "Excitement"... Was It Robert Downey Jr?

I miss seeing celebrities! Granted, they never changed my life... but it was exciting to bump into them on the streets, restaurants, bars, theatres & have exchanges with them. Of course there's lots of filming that constantly goes on in NYC... so it's a daily occurrence. But I miss those exciting exchanges!!!

While living in NYC, I never became jaded by running into celebrities. In fact, I felt more alive & always had a great story to tell friends later that day. On the downside, if a stars trailer was parked outside your apartment window, the noise & fumes from the generator were annoying- but that's a small price to pay! I have yet to meet one Suburbanite who actually saw or met a celebrity in Suburbia.

It goes without saying that in NYC, you can do something exciting every night & never be alone. There are tons of shows to see, hundreds of restaurants that stay open late & always people on the streets. Nonstop excitement, diversity & life!

The most "exciting" thing in Suburbia is shopping! There are super sale days, early morning door busters, coupon cutting sale days & even late night shopping sales... (I am guilty of the later, but haven't seen more than a handful shop at that time of night). After all, its "too late", or they're "getting ready for tomorrow" or watching reality shows in real time, rather than dvr it & watch it at a convenient time. wtf???

It's a very different mentality in Suburbia. Another "exciting" thing to do is sports!!! Well, sort of, if you consider WATCHING it on tv rather than actually participating in it. But an extremely "exciting" thing would be to get a bunch of junk food on a "super sale" AND "play" (I mean WATCH) sports for hours! Yeehaww!!!

Okay, okay... to each his own, but I am just comparing what excitement is in NYC vs Suburbia in general. Hands down NYC is & always will be exciting... for me. I live for my next visit to NYC where I am not consumed by loneliness & dependence on a car.

I realized the difference between "excitement" in Suburbia & NYC tonite in a restaurant when the waiter asked if I was Robert Downey Jr & I just smiled coyly & left the restaurant quickly, exiting like a celebrity (hahaa). As I ducked out, I  felt like maybe I made the waiters nite a little "exciting". At least I knew I wasn't going shopping at some unnecessary "sale" or passing out on the couch from the exhaustion of "watching" marathon sports while gorging.

I went home & checked my airline rewards miles. How soon before I could visit NYC - MY city of excitement? Not soon enough... not soon enough, but maybe... if I could be a double for Robert Downey Jr in his next movie! That could be exciting! And what if in his next movie he played the role of a Suburban shopaholic who watched sports nonstop on the couch. Wow, that would be a trip!!!

Thanks for visiting my blog and please leave any comments, suggestions or what you think about NYC vs Suburbia. I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon.

When Ya Gotta Go... Ya Gotta Go

Suburbia wins hands down when it comes to public restrooms! What are ya talking about you may be asking?

Well, being a native New Yorker, one of the few things I complained about (while living in NYC) was the public restrooms. There are very few, so if you have bladder issues, you are in trouble... I was always in trouble!!! How many Starbucks or McDonalds can you really slip into anyway? However, in Suburbia, you can always find a public toilet. They are in retail stores, supermarkets, home improvement stores, fast food restaurants, gas stations and malls. OMG! Nature does not have to wait in Suburbia... is that an oxymoron? Anyway... Amen! I have finally found a reason why Suburbia is better than NYC & it is because Suburbia has LOTS of restrooms. I am no longer in pain & can hydrate as much as I want!

In NYC, there are verrrry few public restrooms & most of them ain't pretty!!! So yeahhhhh! I am actually happy Suburbia has something that NYC lacks... I always have access to reasonably clean public toilets. It's pathetic that this makes me happy... but it does & I am, so that's that! However...

There is one fabulous restroom in NYC & I LOVE it! I've gotta share this with you - it's an outrageous public restroom  on 42nd Street in Times Square. It is the "Charmin" (as in toilet paper) restrooms. It is a potty palace set up annually for the Holiday Season. They have deejays playing music, picture & video booths for documenting your "visit"! It is extremely clean & I have never had so much fun going to the bathroom!??? Each private bathroom is named after a city such as "Hollywood", "Chicago", "Tucson" etc. And each room (about 20!) comes equipped with a choice of a variety of different types of Charmin toilet paper to use! For the first time in my life, I had to force myself to "go" just so I could check it out! What fun, but that's a one of a kind place. Now if they ever offer THAT here in Suburbia... well, I could almost wet my pants just thinking about it!!!

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The Hood: NYC vs Suburbia

While living in NYC, I was spoiled! Like most New Yorkers, I preferred  to stay in my own neighborhood. I would make a big deal about going crosstown or uptown. I wouldn't even consider the "bridge & tunnel" ride to meet friends for dinner or a night out.

I truly enjoyed my neighborhood. Shopping, eating, drinking, movies, theatre... everything was within walking distance or a subway ride away. Restaurants knew me, storeowners knew me, it was all very familiar.... almost like being in a small town. Not at all like the preconceived idea that people who live outside of NYC have about us New Yorkers. I would like to break this myth... New Yorkers are NOT cold, mean & nasty! We are a friendly diversified group with personality. We may be in a hurry to get to places, but will gladly stop & give directions to you, I know I did that quite often.

Living out in Suburbia, I've gotten even worse about leaving the neighborhood! My dislike of driving everywhere controls my life! I do not want to leave the house & I do not venture far away. I don't like to get on highways where drivers are talking/texting on cells & possibly drinking. Unlike NYC, when having a night out, there aren't many places to go. Sure, there are malls, restaurants with bright lights that close way too early & not much in the diversity department. So, why bother??? The only way to get directions is from your GPS in your car! There is minimum human contact and perhaps that is why the people in Suburbia seem less friendly to me than New Yorkers. I think it is because of the lack of contact with people. Everyone is in cars. People even drive to their mailboxes & drive to throw out their garbage. OMG! I refuse!!!

It doesn't really matter to me whether I am living in NYC or in Suburbia. (Well, actually it does, BUT)... I enjoy my comfort zone, as most of us do. As different as both places are, the consistent thing is that I like to keep close to my home. But living in Suburbia is definitely much more lonely especially if you're a "people person". You can't really walk out at midnight and get a newspaper, ice cream bar or have a conversation with anyone on the street. And if you decide to get in your car... it may take awhile to find a store that is open at midnight. After all, most people are getting ready for tomorrow instead of enjoying their today.

Thanks for visiting my blog and please leave any comments, suggestions or what you think about NYC vs Suburbia. I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon.

GAGA-licious: Another Concert Experience

In my last entry it was pretty obvious that I preferred the NYC concert experience compared to Suburbia. But if you read it, (and I'm sure you did), at the end of my entry, I wrote that Lady Gaga was coming to The Oracle Arena. And I started to think hmmm... if this Native New Yorker is returning to perform at The Oracle, maybe I should revisit the Arena too?

I am no longer a virgin to The Oracle Arena (Oakland's equal(?) to NYC's Madison Square Garden). I had my 2nd Suburban experience going to the Arena. This time, I kindda knew what to expect with the timing, the driving, the parking, the tailgating... so I wasn't as green!

I was fortunate enough to get some tickets the night before, even though it was sold out. I thought maybe it was kharma or the universe allowing me a 2nd chance at a Suburban concert & this time not be as critical. I was psyched about seeing this New York Italian artist called Gaga & all the hoopla that surrounds her & her incredible underrated voice. Wow, can she sing!!! It was such a fantastic show, I almost forgot I was in Suburbia! haaahaa (Sorry, fellow Suburbanites)!

Her positive energy and messages about being different and acceptance was very touching. She also SANG everything LIVE, unlike some other blonde "performers"... oops I said it again! Gaga thanked the audience for spending our money to see her show & she was determined to give us our moneys worth. She wasn't kidding! She is a multi talented musician & songwriter also. I left the show a Monster, (aka a Gaga Fan), loving the Lady & her music. And even though I was in Suburbia, I saw two of the best concerts in my entire life... Prince & Gaga... within one month of each other!!! "Awesome"... but you will NEVER hear me utter "dude" so "forgetaboutit" as they say in New York! 

I still love concerts in NYC & prefer them, but think I finally was able to enjoy the event for what it was. It certainly helped having Gaga there as my support and cheerleader.

Once again, if you have any comments or similar experiences about NYC vs SanFran, please share them. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog and please pass the word.