Tick Tock - I'm a Number Freak

I'm a freak! A number freak. What's a number freak? I'll tell you what a number freak is... at least for me. I look at the clock, see the time and the numbers are always are a significant date to me. Whenever I look at the time, of course I see the time, but that passes quickly. I see dates. I see birthdays, death dates, addresses, anniversaries... the list goes on. I know this is not normal behavior, but what the hell would I know about normal? Does anyone else do this or am I just a number freak?

Is it because I may have Dyslexia or OCD? Hmm, another topic for my next therapy session. Do I have a "thing" about numbers and dates? All I know is when I see the time I automatically see variations on the number. For example 4:10 would register to me as (obviously) 4/10 or 10/4 or 01/4.  I'm not obsessed with time (except when I look in the mirror and see what time is doing to me) or am I? 

I don't wear a watch, it's too restricting for me. (And I'd never wear one of those ridiculously huge ones that are larger than Big Ben... if I wore a watch.) I've always been late, so maybe I am a freak when it comes to time or numbers. My mother would always say how long I made her wait till I was ready to be born. (Yet another therapy session.)

Or maybe it's the fact that my father was a bookie and I would have to write down numbers for him. My parents often played cards and had card parties... numbers surrounded me.

I'm a visual person, so maybe that's the reason why I see the possibilities in numbers. At any rate, I've learned it's "time" (oops) to embrace my inner freak. Gotta go, the time says 1:24, gonna call a friend. Their birthday is on 4/21, don't wanna be late.

Thanks for visiting! Please follow, share & spread the word...

Facebook - nyc2suburbia         Twitter - @nyc2suburbia

Visit Our Shop ~ Click Link Below:

nyc2suburbia SHOP

      

Displaced New Yorker? nyc2suburbia Commuter? 

If U love NYC, Suburbia OR both, our products are for you! 

Survive with your unique Style, $ense & Sanity with nyc2suburbia products. 

Not Gay Enough - WTF ?

I'm prescreened and ready to give an interview for an upcoming book about relationships. All types of relationships... hurray! The author is currently writing a book and wants to include a section from a Gay man's perspective since all types of relationships are being included. Wow, what a great opportunity to help break down a few Gay stereotypes. Maybe I'll even get a GLAAD Award?

The FRUIT Stand

The release form is signed and I'm ready. The time is set and all systems are go. The interview starts and seems to be going well, but after a few questions... I'm suddenly disqualified! We can't continue the interview. I can't be in the book, because once again I do not "fit in", I'm not what was expected. The need for a stereotype must be met. I'm not gonna sell books, you see I'm a monogamous Gay man. Big yawn, "we don't want that, we want a modern take on relationships". WTF? Are you kidding me? Modern? Oh, that's right, since "the Gays" are able to get legally married now, we're all  able to legally cheat just like "the Straights"? Is that the new way of saying I do, or is it simply saying I can't, I won't or I don't care enough to commit? I don't fit into this book about all types of relationships in today's world. They wanna hear about the stereotypical promiscuous Gay male in a relationship who has an erection all day stalking his next conquest. Or they'd prefer a "don't ask, don't tell" situation. Wow, how current and open minded, after all it is the 80's and AIDS and STD's haven't even entered the picture yet, right?

Okay, breathe... perhaps I should've just given the public what they want or need to hear to confirm that all Gays are not in committed relationships and are whores. Oops, did I say that? Oh well. After all, we are all just drag queens, leather daddies, bears or girlie boys - that's all you see from the press when they cover Gay Pride Parades anyway, so it must be true. And of course all Gays love Gaga, Madonna, Barbra or Judy - okay guilty on those last charges. I was surprised that another view of Gay life wouldn't be shown to the world. Well, I'm not a whore and I won't sell out. Personally I'm a little sick of the whole Gay trend "I wanna kid, I wanna adopt." What's the latest accessory we need?... oh that's right, a child! Besides, who else can teach kids about style, fashion and fabulousness? Just ask our straight girlfriends who always need us to take them shopping or do their hair. And remember we can do it all in between our workouts at the gym and trysts in the back rooms of those trendy after hours sex clubs.

Bitter not at all, surprised - yes! It's 2014 and this is the first time I've been told that I'm not Gay enough! We've come a long way, baby... but obviously some people still need the comfort of their stereotypes. The bottom line is that stereotypes still sell. Okay, Mary... gotta run, just made an appointment with my hot new trainer after my mani/pedi. Fabulous? You bet! Not Gay enough? You tell me...

Thanks for visiting! Please follow, share & spread the word...

Facebook - nyc2suburbia         Twitter - @nyc2suburbia

Visit Our Shop ~ Click Link Below:

nyc2suburbia SHOP

      

Displaced New Yorker? nyc2suburbia Commuter? 

If U love NYC, Suburbia OR both, our products are for you! 

Survive with your unique Style, $ense & Sanity with nyc2suburbia products. 

Get Happy

Happy... is it a state of mind or just a state? I almost forgot what it felt like to be happy. Wow, it's great and for me it's about being home. "My little town blues are melting away"... just like Liza sang in the song written for her (and not Sinatra) New York, New York. I have a certain air of confidence and familiarity with everyday things and I love it! It's been so long since I've been able to say that I'm happy and I love it, damn it! Okay,okay I gotta calm down now.

I like to complain (so this may come as a switch) but I didn't realize how much I missed NYC until recently. I was lucky enough to return for a big chunk of time developing the play about Dementia-Mama-Drama. I was so happy to be able to orchestrate two readings of  "Some of These Daze" back home. OMG, "if I can make it there..." Yeah, I know I know, shut up with your musical references already!

In NYC, I'm able to walk out on the streets anytime of day or night and not feel like a prisoner. The other night we were with good friends watching The Oscars in their bedroom. We were sipping martinis and having a picnic on their bed - no, no, no... not what you're thinking! Anyway, I had a glimpse of my old Suburban life - I saw wild life. Alright, maybe not wild life, but a mouse ran by me... not once, but twice as I went to refill our ice. The odd thing is that I didn't scream! In Suburbia, all I do is jump and overact to falling leaves, hooting owls, howling coyotes, lawn mowers growling at ungodly hours, deer passing by me on the way to the mailbox, that I've become jaded by a little mouse. Remember I'm the original Green Acres Gone Gay (GAGG).

Have you ever felt that you didn't want to return to your home when you're away? Have you ever felt like there's so little that you miss, that it doesn't matter? Not even your bed? Well, this happened to me and it's so freeing but it got me thinking. Okay, here's another song reference this time from Judy (Liza's mother, for the theatrically challenged) "Forget your troubles come on Get Happy..." I'm feeling happy being back home in NYC and I know that this is where I belong. I just gotta make sure my ruby slippers (okay my red high tops) never leave my feet while I'm back here in my land of Oz, because... "there's no place like home..." 

Thanks for visiting! Please follow, share & spread the word...

Facebook - nyc2suburbia         Twitter - @nyc2suburbia

Visit Our Shop ~ Click Link Below:

nyc2suburbia SHOP

      

Displaced New Yorker? nyc2suburbia Commuter? 

If U love NYC, Suburbia OR both, our products are for you! 

Survive with your unique Style, $ense & Sanity with nyc2suburbia products. 

Janis Joplin ... You'll Always Have a "Piece of My Heart"

January 19th is Janis Joplin's birthday and she was one of my first "American Idols". I didn't "discover" her until after her death. I read everything about her and listened to her music for hours while annoying my parents... and the neighbors. I was blown away by her voice, her creativity and her honesty. She was ahead of her time and thought outside the box. Janis actually questioned "the box"... whatever the hell "the box" is! Wow, whatta concept. I related to her feeling like an outsider and never fitting in. I also knew what it was like to be different and to be bullied, this was way before bullying was such a hot topic in the media. I'm sure Janis would be a big supporter of the NOH8 Campaign today.

I find it comforting (maybe Southern Comforting) that I live near Larkspur, her last home. It's a beautiful suburban town with redwood trees not far from San Francisco - a city she loved. Often when crossing the Golden Gate Bridge at night, I picture Janis driving her psychedelic Porsche zooming past me onto the windy roads to Larkspur. Okay, I have a vivid imagination!

Even though Janis has been gone for many years... her energy and her music are still alive. And now there's a whole new audience discovering her with the new hit Broadway show "A Night With Janis."  I saw the show and loved it even more than I thought possible. I'm gonna see it again (and again) it was a magical night at the theatre and nyc2suburbia will once again be tweeting about it! I know Janis would be loving the show. She'd be cackling in the back of the orchestra every night and would make sure the audience got up off their asses! Just like Mary Bridget Davies and Kacee Clanton do at all of their performances.

Janis has inspired many of us and we've learned from her "Get it While You Can" philosophy, to live each day the best you can, coz it may be the last. Amen sister!

So, Happy Birthday Janis and Keep on Rockin’! I'll be having my Southern Comfort while toasting one helluva woman and listening to your music. I will continue to celebrate your life and be forever grateful because you will always have a "Piece of My Heart".

Thanks for visiting! Please follow, share & spread the word...

Facebook - nyc2suburbia         Twitter - @nyc2suburbia

Visit Our Shop ~ Click Link Below:

nyc2suburbia SHOP

      

Displaced New Yorker? nyc2suburbia Commuter? 

If U love NYC, Suburbia OR both, our products are for you! 

Survive with your unique Style, $ense & Sanity with nyc2suburbia products. 

What A Dump !

I cannot believe what I actually did tonight. Furthermore I can't even believe that I'm gonna share it with you, but I've never been one to keep things to myself. Okay, I joined forces with the rest of the Suburbanites out here and did something many of them do. I couldn't believe how many of them did this and I'd constantly make fun of anyone who did.

THE DUMP

First of all, I was not talking on my cell phone, texting or drinking while driving - that infuriates me and I get crazy when I see that! But what I did I'm almost embarrassed to share, especially for a native New Yorker who loves to walk. I DROVE the car 126 feet from the driveway to pick up the mail and throw out the garbage. OMG, I said it out loud, I may delete this. What the hell came over me? What was I thinking?  I've stooped to an all time low. Who am I? I may have to even turn in my Gay card and never mention Green Acres Gone Gay (GAGG) again. What've I done? This is not fabulous behavior.

THE MAIL

In my defense it was not premeditated. As I started to walk outside in the cold stillness of the early evening, I thought that I heard an animal. I immediately thought I was gonna be attacked. (I think this many times when I walk outside). I thought it was a bear, a killer deer or that "friendly" burglar who has been spotted in our community (the community is so PC they actually call it a "friendly" burglar - WTF?) Nevertheless I got my ass in the car so fast and drove 126 feet to throw out the garbage and pick up the mail. I am and will always be totally embarrassed on so many levels... and whatta disappointment. The mail was all junk and as for the garbage... like Bette Davis said "What a dump".

Thanks for visiting! Please follow, share & spread the word...

Facebook - nyc2suburbia         Twitter - @nyc2suburbia

Visit Our Shop ~ Click Link Below:

nyc2suburbia SHOP

      

Displaced New Yorker? nyc2suburbia Commuter? 

If U love NYC, Suburbia OR both, our products are for you! 

Survive with your unique Style, $ense & Sanity with nyc2suburbia products. 

Reflections ... 2013

Whatta year it's been, phew! It's been filled with highs and lows and that's what is so great about life... ya never know.

Whenever I hear anyone utter the phrase "next year has got to be better than this year" or "this year really was terrible, can't wait for next year" I'd like to say - "shut up and thank God you're alive"! You can't have good without some bad just like Liza sang in "But The World Goes 'Round". How can anyone expect that everything always has to be wonderful? I mean I do, but I ain't no Pollyanna or Mary Sunshine, believe me! I'm a complainer and the first one to say the year was less than perfect, but that would also dismiss all the good things that happened.

2013 started off with Mama dying - that was the worst and most difficult part of the entire year. I've had other shitty things happen to me this year too, but why dwell on that? "That's Life" just like Sinatra sang because many good things happened too. I received an award for my work in Alzheimer's and LGBT Awareness in the community. A play I cowrote was accepted and performed at The Fringe Festival with great emotional response. I was able to bounce back and forth from NYC 2 Suburbia helping to keep my sanity. I was also lucky enough to be in the West Village during the historic DOMA ruling and experience the overwhelming sense of pride when Edith Windsor gave her speech to the crowd. I had many good things happen to me, but I don't wanna toot my own horn too much... okay, maybe just a little. I saw a lot of great theatre and have continued to focus on my writing and photography. I've been diving deeper into social media and "All That Jazz". (Okay hadda throw in another show song title). Oh and lest I forget, I managed to survive the Holidaze!

So here's to Mama (who never complained about her bad years and she had many) and "Here's to Life".  After all, the future is full of hope... and I'm looking forward to 2014. Another opportunity to live a colorful, eventful and fulfilling year. I'm gonna keep my reflections of 2013 positive. And as far as the New Years resolutions game goes... gimme a break, will ya?

Thanks for visiting! Please follow, share & spread the word...

Facebook - nyc2suburbia         Twitter - @nyc2suburbia

Visit Our Shop ~ Click Link Below:

nyc2suburbia SHOP

      

Displaced New Yorker? nyc2suburbia Commuter? 

If U love NYC, Suburbia OR both, our products are for you! 

Survive with your unique Style, $ense & Sanity with nyc2suburbia products. 

A Christmas Dream or Nightmare? Ho, Ho, Ho

Ho, Ho, Ho... the mere phrase gets me anxious. What if all your past, present and future Christmases were all rolled into one? Imagine the classic "A Christmas Carol" with a different twist! They'd all mesh together changing gears at any moment. You wouldn't know what, where or who you were suppose to be. You're in a dreamlike state with heightened overtones that could turn into a nightmare. Did Christmas already happen, is it happening now, will it be happening soon? Will it start over again and again like in "Groundhog Day"? Only with very slow movements and distorted sounds - almost like being under water. But I don't swim. Oh no it's starting - tick, tock, tick tock. The dream begins...

My heart races just thinking about Christmas. Anxiety, worry, anticipation, check lists, family, obligations, shopping, gifts, overeating, commercials, stressful, frenetic, frustrating, nonstop, black friday, cyber monday, returns, bills, happy, sad. Stop the insanity please!

I keep layering my anxiety by adding people I don't want to be with or can't relate to. Annoying strangers enter the party as the crowd thickens and I start to loose my composure and my breath. I have trouble breathing now and become off balanced and dizzy. 

The food has been demolished, there are no working bathrooms, the coats are nowhere to be found and there's another party where I am the guest of honor, but I'm late and look like hell. What do I do? Where do I go? I'm lost. Can anyone hear me? Are words coming out of my mouth? Can anyone help me? I try to focus on my breathing, my breathing, my breathing. All of a sudden the entire room begins to copy me and they are breathing wildly taking up all the oxygen. Why is this all happening to me on this special night? I just want this nightmare to end and start a fresh new day. But then the roof collapses and some of the guests get hit by the gigantic snowflake decorations, while others start to faint from hyperventilating. This is not a time to celebrate but they're all laughing! Where are the happy colors? Is this my vision of lollipops dancing in my head? We're all trapped and can't escape, but there has to be some hope, right? A downpour begins and there's a large hole in the main room where the water is quickly rising and becoming scary. Everyone appears catatonic or bored except for me as the christmas music gets louder and louder repeating endlessly.

I scream out for help and wake up terrified in my soaking wet pajamas. Where am I? Thank God it was only a nightmare and thank God it's December 26th. Enough with the Ho, Ho, Ho... at least for this year!

Thanks for visiting! Please follow, share & spread the word...

Facebook - nyc2suburbia         Twitter - @nyc2suburbia

Visit Our Shop ~ Click Link Below:

nyc2suburbia SHOP

      

Displaced New Yorker? nyc2suburbia Commuter? 

If U love NYC, Suburbia OR both, our products are for you! 

Survive with your unique Style, $ense & Sanity with nyc2suburbia products. 

"Memories" - Back 2 Brooklyn

Barbra Toasts the Crowd at Barclays 

"Happy Days Are Here Again"... Barbra is back in the news. So to celebrate the DVD/CD release of Barbra Streisand's "Back to Brooklyn" Concert and the PBS Special, I've decided to share one of my most popular posts again. Of course there are a few changes made to the original post. Since my initial story,  I finally got to see Barbra in concert for the first time at "Back to Brooklyn". The story I wrote about meeting Barbra was also published and included in "Barbra Memories" coinciding with her concert. I attended the book signing in NYC and the book was even presented to Barbra by the author Ally Waldman.  

Overwhelming Opening Ovation Video Link

So what do you do when you finally get a chance to meet a celebrity you've admired your entire life? I am not a fanatic, but Barbra's career has been meaningful to me ever since I can recall. My daily vocabulary usually includes lines from her movies or songs. "Don't tell me not to live just sit and putter..."

My connection to Barbra was only through her work, that has been the extent of it. I was never fortunate enough to see (or able to afford) one of her rare live concerts. We both have a similar rhythm that comes from being native New Yorkers. I learned to question things and see things differently because she made me aware of this at a very young age. I am eternally grateful to her for that. "Papa, can you hear me? Try to understand me..."

I entered a contest through Sony Records that coincided with the release of her recording "What Matters Most" and during the filming of "The Guilt Trip" (originally titled "My Mother's Curse"). There was one winner and it was ME... OMG! I was chosen to meet Barbra Streisand in Las Vegas on the set of her movie. "It's gonna be a great day..."

That's ME on Barbra's Official Website

Sooooo, what the hell do you say to an icon when you finally get to meet her? I had a list of things I wanted to say, but I was just overwhelmed with emotion and not able to do my "checklist". The first glimpse I caught of her is when she appeared on the set. I was about 20 feet away from her and I could not believe I was watching Barbra shoot a scene and I was actually gonna meet her in a few minutes! My armpits were wet, my mouth was dry, my lips were tense and I was doing my deep breathing to help calm me for what seemed like an eternity. "There are moments you remember all your life. There are moments you wait for and dream of all your life. This is one of those moments..."

During a break in the filming, she looked my way and rushed towards me, almost tripping over the velvet rope. She pointed at me and said "Ohhhhh you're the winner!" and then extended her hand towards me. Holy shit! She came towards ME and spoke to ME. (And yes her hands were incredibly soft "like buttah"). I was almost at a loss for words, which is rare for those that know me. I introduced myself and she was "sweet as pie" not "tough as leather". We talked about her upcoming album and I told her I loved one of the preview cuts I heard. She asked which one, so I sang a few lines. OMG, I sang to Barbra Streisand - what chutzpah! I wished her Mazel Tov on the success of her new CD. When I told her that she was my first wedding gift, she looked at me like I was crazy. "Whaddya tawkin' about, kid"?

"Ohhhhh you're the winner"

I explained that my partner and I would finally be "allowed" to get married and were returning to NYC to do it! She wished us lots of luck and said "it's about time, I'm so happy for you." She immediately asked her photographer to take some photos and he suggested to shoot on the set, since the lighting was better. I agreed! We walked over to the set together, which was in the lobby at Caesar's Palace in Vegas. I said "Wait a minute, I wanna get my good side". She looked at me and said "Which is your good side"? I said "you tell me, you're the director". She laughed. OMG! I made Barbra Streisand laugh AND congratulate me all within a few minutes. She was so warm, engaging and genuine. After the photo shoot, she told me to ..."stick around for as long as I want to...". Wow! She liked me, she really liked me! But I kept thinking -  "Nicky Arnstein, Nicky Arnstein... I'll never see her again." NOT true, I was on and off the set for the rest of the night and she even asked if I wanted to be in a scene at the slot machines - OMG, yes! Somewhere in between all that, I gathered up the courage to ask if I could get some vintage magazines autographed that I brought with me. She not only signed them, she signed them in the specific color markers I brought! WTF? "Extra, extra I'm in love. I'm gonna thank my lucky stars above..."

Book Signing of "Barbra Memories"

At the end of the night, which slowly turned into morning, I was exhausted. I was leaving the set when Barbra's publicist asked if I was leaving already? I said it's really late and it was one helluva night for me, BUT if Barbra wants a glass of champagne when she wraps, I'll be waiting for her. The anticipation, the preparation, the traveling, the uncertainty, the meeting, the conversation, the photos, the laughter all the "memories" truly made it a once in a lifetime experience and I was one lucky guy. I mean "How lucky can you get?" And as Barbra said in "Yentl"... "Nothing is impossible". Of course she was right... once again!

Thanks for visiting! Please follow, share & spread the word...

Facebook - nyc2suburbia         Twitter - @nyc2suburbia

Visit Our Shop ~ Click Link Below:

nyc2suburbia SHOP

Displaced New Yorker? nyc2suburbia Commuter? 

If U love NYC, Suburbia OR both, our products are for you! 

Survive with your unique Style, $ense & Sanity with nyc2suburbia products.